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" 'Animal Inspector Helen Burdick speculates that the higher-than-usual reports of odd animal behavior might be attributable to media scare. None of the animals in question has tested positive for the disease. When asked what natural explanation she could offer for verifiably odd animal behavior, if not rabies, Burdick suggested "distemper or larval migraine worms or any number of microbes that attack the central nervous system. My best guess," she added "is spring fever.'' ' " Julius refolded the paper. "I don't see a problem." |
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DeVoe pushed a stick of gum in his mouth. It was what he did since giving up cigarettes. "You don't see a problem," he said. He snapped the paper away. "It's not spring fever or any of the other shit. It's your omni-whatchamacallit. It's all over the goddamn neighborhood." From a folder he pulled out a two-page computer printout. They were chemical analyses of the ground water DeVoe's men had sampled from and around the Hazzard home. |
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"It's in their water, Julius." |
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For a minute Julius studied the figures, then slowly removed his glasses. "Frank, the standard toxin screening cannot detect the omnimycinol molecule. It's almost identical to human hormone structures. And nobody ever screens water for hormones, even in expanded profiles. Even if they did, they'd need highly sophisticated analyses to show it's artificial." |
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"Julius, if the kid starts to turn funny, they'll be screening for fairy piss," DeVoe said, chewing furiously. "The concentration is twenty parts per million, ten times what it was the last time. I don't know how many containers you people buried, but your average dump truck weighs three tons empty. You drive that a few times over a bunch of barrels five feet down and you're going to have a lot of stuff leech into the aquifer. And that's what happened when they built that pool. Just count your blessings they didn't build the pool on the containers, or we'd be playing slapjack in prison." |
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Julius returned to his chair and sat quietly for a moment. "So what are you suggesting we do?" |
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As if in a strange ritual dance, DeVoe got up and walked to the window, blew a large pink bubble and fixed his eye on the White House. "Whatever it takes to get in and neutralize it," he said. "All |
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